The Therapy Trail

May 1, 2017

Crunch.

The sound of the rocky trail under my boots gives me energy. A purpose.

Crunch. Crunch. Crunch.

With every step, every climb, every hike, I step further away from depression.

I struggled with it, on and off.

"How are you?" Everyone asks.

"I'm okay," I fake a smile.

Sometimes, I battled with depression, but no one can tell. Social media shows the filtered moments of my life. I take a selfie on the tough days. I choose the appropriate filter to hide the sadness. It's like dressing up for church on Sunday, while inside you're a tangled mess. Sweeping the dirt and crumbs under the rug, until you have time to deal with the real problem. I was the main actress in the film "Nothing Is Wrong".

Finding Balance on the Trail

March 15, 2017

Balance. One of those words you know is good for you, but you never get around to doing it, right? It's like that workout plan you promised yourself on New Year's. The diet that didn't last. The fancy water bottle you bought that tracks how much you should be drinking, but in the end, it's another 20 wasted bucks. Oh, I'll have more balance in my life tomorrow. Then tomorrow turns into a few more days. Months. Years. Whoa. You're in your mid-twenties, freaking out.

Where did the balance go?

Sigh.

Can't Turn Back Now

November 29, 2016

Pictures don't show the full story.

"Are you sure you want to do this hike?"

"Yes," I reply. But in my head I can think of a list of reasons why I'm not ready.

Turtlehead Peak was a hike I had been eyeing for months, but I wasn't completely ready. I was out of shape, unmotivated, and feeling like I was at rock bottom in life. All things that can be a recipe for disaster. A few weeks prior, I had found out scary news about my health. Work was taking everything out of me. Friends were gone. Relationships felt stagnant. Life had changed, and was changing.

The last thing I needed to do was (literally) climb a mountain, when I had so many "theatrical" ones in my life.